This is another early One Direction single that has disturbing implications when you think about the lyrics for a moment. Not only is the vague, never-explained ‘one thing’ the girl being addressed has a little bit of a creepy concept, but this is easily the most hyperbolically oversexed song the band has ever released, with over-the-top descriptions that are the lyrical equivalent of a Tex Avery freakout.
Archives for February 2014
This song has a wonderful melody sampled from a Motown-era Michael Jackson track, but the stupid lyric and Bieber’s total lack of singing talent manage to make it into something mediocre at best, although it’s still better than anything else on the Believe album.
This was pretty much the last Glee single to make the Top Forty, but the series sure as Hell went out with a bang. This extraordinarily creative cello-based arrangement of Michael Jackson’s legendary “Smooth Criminal” is not only one of the show’s most striking and memorable covers ever, but the only successful cover of this notoriously hard-to-perform song I’ve ever heard at all.
This song is probably the most vocally tolerable of Bieber’s hits, as it caught him at that sweet spot when he had grown out of his irritating early-career falsetto but had not yet acquired the constipated sound he has on his current stuff. However, that’s the nicest thing you can say about this song, as it is a dull, vapid acoustic banality that is totally without merit in either music or lyrics.
Chris Brown has said many degrading things about women in his day, but this has to rank pretty high on the list. A collaboration between acts as justly reviled as Brown and the New Boyz wasn’t exactly a promising prospect to begin with, but this is arguably the worst R&B pickup-line in history: even “Bedrock” and “Sexy Bitch” seem downright clever by comparison. There is no doubt whatsoever that this is one of the very worst songs of its year.
This song caught Lil Wayne on one of his increasingly infrequent good days, with a moving and meaningful lyric that is actually about something substantial, and when you combine that with a lovely and striking chorus from the always talented Bruno Mars you have one of the finest of Wayne’s late-career songs.
This song isn’t as bad as “Love Story”, but it’s definitely the weakest thing on the Speak Now album. It’s meant to be an attack on critics, but comes off as weak, not displaying enough bite or sharpness to have the same impact as Swift’s other ‘angry’ songs.
There are many decisions by the Glee showrunners that I disagree with, but their decision to pay tribute to the “Friday” meme on a professional television show just baffles me. Granted, the Glee version of “Friday” is about a hundred times better than the original, but it still wastes the show’s great voices singing one of the most banal songs in history, and it didn’t exactly make people any more inclined to take the show seriously.